Woke Ad Agencies Are Failing America’s Brands: Why Dealers and Customers Deserve Better

Ladies and gentlemen, let’s take a deep dive into the disaster that is modern advertising. Brands like Jaguar, Volvo, and Bud Light aren’t just missing the mark—they’re careening off a cliff, all thanks to the woke culture of their ad agencies and the clueless elites running their marketing departments.

It’s a vicious cycle, folks. These ads aren’t failing by accident—they’re the natural byproduct of an industry dominated by rich kids, woke ideologies, and marketing executives who wouldn’t know a car loan from a student loan because, guess what? They’ve never had to pay for either.

Jaguar: Andy Warhol or Just Another Flop?

Let’s start with Jaguar, the latest victim of this cultural rot. Their new ad is being called “woke” by old-school analysts, but that’s giving it too much credit. This isn’t woke—it’s misguided. It’s an avant-garde, Warhol-inspired fever dream that screams, “Look how artsy we are!” instead of, “Hey, we sell luxury cars.”

But here’s the kicker: Jaguar didn’t make this ad for its customers. No, this ad was made to impress the creative directors and failed artists at their agency. These are the same people who spend their days crying about equity and oppression while sipping oat milk lattes paid for by mommy and daddy. These are not people who understand the Jaguar dealer body. They don’t care about the folks on the ground who sell these cars or the buyers who actually drive them.

This ad isn’t for the buyers—it’s for the ad agency. It’s for the industry awards. It’s for Instagram posts that say, “Look how bold we are!” Meanwhile, the dealers who are spending millions upgrading their showrooms are left wondering why no one is walking through the door.

Volvo: Virtue Signaling with Icebergs

And then there’s Volvo. Remember their iceberg ad? It was supposed to symbolize their commitment to sustainability. They even dropped an iceberg into the ocean as part of their marketing stunt. Talk about heavy-handed symbolism. But what’s happened since then? Volvo has quietly walked back its EV promises. That’s right—the same brand that lectured us about saving the planet is now saying they can’t deliver on their lofty goals.

Where’s the outrage? Where’s the accountability? I’ll tell you where—it’s nowhere. The woke media won’t call them out because Volvo has mastered the art of virtue signaling. They don’t care about the product; they care about the narrative.

And who’s paying the price for this hypocrisy? The dealers and the customers. Volvo’s marketing VP isn’t losing sleep over this. She’s too busy posting about DEI initiatives while cashing her six-figure paycheck.

How the Woke Bubble Works

So, how does this happen? How do brands end up with ads that alienate their customers and enrage their dealers? It starts at the agencies, where a woke, privileged culture dominates.

Ad agencies are filled with rich kids who’ve never worked a real job in their lives. These are people who think they’re oppressed because their trust fund only covers two vacations a year instead of three. They drive Teslas to work, cry about Jan 6th, and pat themselves on the back for posting about equity on Instagram.

And guess what? These same people end up running marketing departments at OEMs. That’s right—the ultimate dream for every agency account manager is to land a VP of Marketing gig at a car company. And what do they bring to the table? Booking meetings. That’s it.

They don’t know how to manage a budget. They don’t understand project management. Ask them what Agile is, and they’ll think you’re talking about yoga. These are the people who can’t tell you the cost of a car note because their parents are still paying for their car—and their insurance.

And then there’s the nepotism. Someone works for daddy’s company, gets promoted four times in three years, and somehow ends up in charge of marketing at an automaker. These are the people calling the shots on your multimillion-dollar ad campaigns.

Who Pays the Price? Dealers and Customers

The real victims in all of this aren’t the agencies or the marketing executives—they’re the dealers and the customers. Dealers are the ones who have to sell these cars, invest millions in their facilities, and deal with the fallout of campaigns that don’t drive traffic.

And the customers? They’re stuck watching ads that don’t resonate, that don’t explain the product, and that don’t give them a reason to buy.

The Bottom Line: It’s Time for a Reckoning

Here’s the truth: until brands take back control from these woke agencies and their clueless marketing executives, nothing will change. Ads will keep missing the mark. Dealers will keep losing money. And customers will keep turning to brands that actually understand them.

It’s time to get back to basics. Focus on the product. Listen to the dealers. And for the love of all that’s holy, stop hiring agencies that care more about winning awards than selling cars. Because at the end of the day, the only thing that matters is results.

And right now, these woke agencies aren’t delivering them.